Bem Brasil: Meat, magnificent meat.

Just back from a trip much closer to home, to Manchester's Bem Brasil restaurant for the Rodizio lunchtime special. I dined at their Northern Quarter restaurant not long after they opened in 2007. The service was terrible, the Caipirinhas watery and overpriced and the hot buffet was cold. This reviewer sent a detailed letter highlighting the inadequacies. They ignored it. As it seems they had more pressing things on their minds, like furthering their burgeoning business empire. And as well they might. As, despite the numerous discrepancies that evening there was one positive that shone through - the meat.


The winning combination of perfectly barbecued meat and all-you-can-eat abundance has been an undeniable hit for Bem Brasil. From its modest beginnings on the site of the old Land O' Cakes pub at the Ancoats end of the Northern Quarter the owners could not be accused of resting on their laurels. They now occupy surely one of the most prestigious and expensive lets in the city centre - a sprawling two-level venue overlooking Deansgate just doors away from fellow runaway-success story restauranteurs San Carlo. Throw in a third branch down the wrong end of the East Lancs and they've got a Brazilian mini-chain on their hands.


So after 5 years of admittedly half-arsed boycotting (in truth I'd just never got round to going again, and Grill on the Alley had very adequately satisfied all my primal meat urges) I decided to pay them another visit mainly to take them up on their bargain lunchtime Rodizio special. On arrival at the Deansgate restaurant I was greeted by a chirpy lady at the front desk who took me upstairs to the vast dining area. With her simple instructions of "eat as much as you like for £12.50" still ringing in my ears I quickly helped myself to the vast array of hot and cold offerings at the buffet while I kept lookout for the men with the skewers of meat. I paused only to order what turned out to be a robust Malbec - spicy and full bodied, ideal for the carnivore challenge that lay ahead.


The buffet included the usual salad suspects but before your brain even starts to think about any Pizza Hut salad bar comparisons down a Special Brew instantly and send those brain cells packing. This buffet was in a different stratosphere (metaphorically speaking of course - it was actually on the same planet, it was just better). The selection went on to include a pork and rice pilaff, stir-fried cabbage, fried plantain and sweet red peppers. All were delicious.


Dining at lunch time not only provides a 50 per cent cheaper bill than in the evening but also means there are less fellow meat fiends getting in the way of you and the passadores. My jovial meat waiter helpfully described each cut of meat as he carved at my table. Despite only a smattering of diners present he scurried about the room, back and forth with legs of lamb, pork ribs, rump steak, chicken thighs, pork sausage and beef ribs. Every cut of meat bore all the hallmarks of good barbecue cooking - smoky charcoal taste yet mouthwateringly tender, with the lamb being particularly outstanding for its lingering juicy flavours.


Like everything in life though you can have too much of a good thing. And inevitably there comes a point where you have to turn the card on your table from green to red (a clever face-saving system allowing you to inform the waiter that you are indeed a lesser man who just can't take any more meat - without forcing you to say it out loud). Not wanting to rob you of your manhood completely the cheery passador appears with a whole pineapple on a skewer as if to suggest a half-way house compromise. The slices of delicious sweet  fruit covered in cinamon and brown sugar is intended to be eaten with the meat but acted as a refreshing mini desert at the end of this gratifying indulgence of the flesh. And with the strains of Astrud Gilberto and Stan Getz in my ears, I struggled to think of a better value lunch option in Manchester as I settled my ludicrously reasonable bill. An all-round fulfilling dining experience had been had, even the Girl from Ipanema couldn't fail to see the smile on this reviewer's face.